Phlegmbotomy

Find your inner mucus
Search for your body's crem de la crem
Claw through the nasal cavities
And perform and elaborate phlegmbotomy.
For you require a projectile.
That boring robot girl to your left
is asking for a booger in her hair.
Flick it, fling it and watch it fly
Then run like hell
She'll rip your head off.

Girls are deadly

I'm scared
I met a bewitching beauty
Girls are deadly

Had our first date at a beach with soft white sand
I played some music and sang her a melody
I'm scared

I've just been kissed
By this gorgeous woman, unbearably pretty
Girls are deadly

Today, she caught me in bed with her best friend
She has a knife, sharpened and bloody
I'm scared

Her friend has been murdered
I'm next, she's getting ready
Girls are deadly

If by the end of the night I'm not dead
I'm turning gay
I'm scared
Girls are deadly.

You

You.
Be you.
Nothing but you.
Your unique strange self
Not this commercialized facade, Pay to Play
but You.
It is nothing but you I need
You.
Yet you elude my grasp.
You frustrate, perplex and puzzle.
Damn you.
Damn you and yet I still want you.
You.
My curse, my struggle, my drug, my fix.
You have hooked me like a fish
Free me or else
You must keep me.

Dreams

I wake every morning somber.
My dreams have vanished into the ether.
But I rejoice, one dream has not left yet.
She's a free soul
I wish I could say she was mine,
But I can't
All I can do is trust her.
It's not as though she can't lie
Not as though she can't hurt me
But you won't - ever
All of my heart is held in your hands
Gentle, soft hands holding my fragile heart
In a moment you can crush it,
But you won't.
I know this.
You aren't God, not an angel, but a lowly human
And yet
You're imperfectly perfect
A whisper, a hint of heaven in my life.

Jenny

Guys
Boring guys
What do they see?
Girl.
Cute girl
Cute lips, big tits
How I'd like to be in her.
How predictable
Sex driven, blinded by hormones.
Me.
You look like a Jenny.
If I could fly, would you fly with me?
Where would we go?
Let's take a celestial cruise
Let's bother the birds
I hate birds.
But I love Aladdin.
Let's make ice cream swirlies out of the clouds.
We'll be in a whole new world
Where it's never the what
Don't really care about the how
But deeply interested in the who
And it's all about the why.

Flatulence

Release me at once!
Lest I expel at an inopportune time.
I shall fumigate entire rooms
Disgust your lover
Frighten small children
And concuss the family dog.
Your innards beckon my forceful escape
Your buttocks but a gateway to the outside world
Do you hear that rumbling?
I am angry.
Fitfully struggling, shaking against my shackles
Oh, I can see a guiding light!
You have relented, unclenching your cheeks.
I run, my prison escape imminent.
Unfortunately, I have decided to bring a friend.
I suggest you find a change of underpants.

Thump

Thump, thump goes the beating of our hearts.
A drum roll to the comedy of our lives.
An unexplained joke,
No one laughs.
Thump, thump,
A ticking time bomb
Counting down our inevitable farewell
From this world.
Thump, thump
Listen to the metronome
The routine beats
It goes on and on
And on.
I listen to the musical melody
Waiting for something,
Anything to break the pattern.
Thump, thump, thump
Heart begins to race
She is here.
And my heart has stopped.

Carcass

A crocodile's head
With its never ending stare
How it sits on the shelf
With its head clear of everything!
Its beady eyes
And its wide jaw
Staying there
For years and years to be.
An animal life
Ended so shortly,
Unknown to me
And everybody.
Its skeleton
So dried up;
All bones white
And so old
But still so strong,
That dead carcass.

I wrote this in fourth grade, and I stumbled upon it going through my old things.

The wondrous effects of LSD

The colors!
I hear them,
Softly purring, smooth
As they whisk through your
Gargantuan grapefruit head
I see a pop!
Oh, where has your head wandered off to?
Au revoir, Monseuir Pamplemousse,
You are but a wisp in my kaleidoscope memory.
I softly sob, feeling your vibrant flavors on my tongue,
Dancing as gracefully as a drunk hippopotamus.
There you are!
Up in the clouds composed
Of a million little balls bouncing about,
Oh, the colors!
Platypus waltz in the sky
Seducing my sanity
Oh the colors...
They fade, softly purring
Into fuzzy gray sounds.

What does Dyspepsia do?

It makes me stand at attention,
Clutch at my side
Makes my stomach be in contention
With my bowels and I bide
My time, waiting for pain to ease
To rest, to finally be at peace.
Oh, there comes another attack,
I’m simply, for lack
Of a better term, crapping.